Dead Man Walking
by Wicked1226
Summary: Naruto has finally broken. The village has pushed him as far as he could go and the final betrayal left him shattered. Picking up the pieces isn't an easy task especially for one such as Gaara. GaaNaru
1. Chapter One: Dead Man Waking

_Disclaimer: I own nothing. I do not own Naruto. Song = Taking Back Suday Make Damn Sure._

Chapter One: Dead Man Walking.

_You've got this new head filled up with smoke_

_I've got my veins all tangled close_

_To the jukebox bars you frequent_

_The safest place to hide_

_A long night spent with your most obvious weaknesses_

_You start shaking at the thought_

_You are everything I want_

_'Cause you are everything I'm not_

Naruto curled up in his dingy little apartment, shoulders hunched and shaking. The flimsy blanket around his shoulders had no comfort to offer; instead it only made the blonde appear smaller. The wall was cracked and the tables were upturned as he lay broken on his bed.

_I__**'m sorry Naruto.**_

The clock struck midnight by the time he had exhausted his tears. His eyes were swollen and his cheeks tearstained. He clutched at the blanket as if he was holding on to his sanity, his fingers bone white from the hard grip.

_**It was for the best**_

Right now Naruto Uzumaki would not move for ramen. Right now he would not move if the world came crashing down because for him, his world was long gone. The sting of betrayal went deep. It ate him from the inside until there was nothing more. He wanted to scream and shout but that wouldn't change a single thing. He had worked so hard, so god damned hard for this. He had worked to be a ninja the people would respect, he worked in hope that they wouldn't hate him anymore, and he suffered.

_**The council has decided...**_

He spent a lifetime surrounded by hatred, and finally, finally when he thought something was turning around, when he had his friends, his precious people he got to realize how little that meant to them.

_**You cannot be trusted to become an Anbu.**_

No one fought for him. He knew that if they put their collective foot down, the ruling could have been overturned. He knew that better than anyone else, but all they did was stand there and agree that it would be better if he wasn't admitted to that rank, and without that rank his most important dream, would never happen. He had waited for weeks for them to do something, but there were no visits, there was no comfort and in the end there was no care for him.

_**The Rokudaime Hokage is...**_

The final blow came unexpected, and it came heralded by a letter not a person. As if he was far too insignificant to be dealt with by an actual human being. The words on that page were the last thing. They were the thing that finally blacked the light out from his eyes. He made no sound as he dropped the paper to the floor. He made no ruckus or mayhem; instead he sat on his bed, covered himself with the blanket and listened to the sound of a falling paper and his heartbeat.

In that room in the apartment building somewhere in Konoha the most terrible sound ever heard rang through the air. It filled every corner and nook of the building until it leaked out with an agony that devoured the entire village.

It was the sound of a dream dieing, quiet and profound with a rage unmatched by anything else until finally it died down like a match burning to the wick.

_**Sasuke Uchiha**_

Somewhere in Sand, Gaara did the impossible and started crying. He barely even noticed it but it had occurred under the bright desert moon. There was no sound around him, not even the whispers of the wind, an ill omen. A sign of change. His sand shivered beneath his feet thrumming with an unknown sense of something. A single tear fell down his face, leaving a trail through his armor. The sand that coated his face darkened with water, and soon after it fell it was gone, almost as if it had never been there at all. His hand reached up to wipe it off and confusion filled his mind only to be replaced by a a single word.

Naruto.

It took seven days to get from Suna to Konoha on a regular basis for an ANBU. It took Gaara two hours, 26 minutes and four seconds to reach Naruto's apartment without being noticed.

He noticed the lump on the bed immediately and slowly walked towards it. What he saw was no Naruto Uzumaki. It was a shell, beautifully constructed to look like him but it was in fact a shell. This was not the fox he knew. Dull eyes stared at him lifelessly as he peeled the blankets of his slender figure. The blonde's fists had sunk into the material of the blanket but after a soft tug they fell away. Gaara was almost disappointed to see that he didn't struggle more.

He looked upon the blonde as if he was some dead thing to behold and he watched, waiting patiently to see any sign of life, but there was none to be found.

''You have to wake up. This isn't you.'' Softly Gaara stroked the whiskered cheeks. They were achingly soft but so very, very cold.

Gaara leaned in and whispered sweet nothings. He told him how strong he was and how nothing was worth this kind of pain. He told him how he could have his revenge, he told him how he could forgive. He begged and he pleaded for hours on end to the small blonde but all he did was lay there, as if nothing had happened, as if no one was trying to bring him back.

Finally Gaara broke down and grabbed his shoulders. ''I love you.'' He growled, his voice harsh ''and I will be your life, your happiness, your everything. I will love you until you hate me and then I will love you again. I will give you a family and a home. I will protect you. I will bear your pain if only you would smile. I will give you everything you want, and all you have to do is wake up. You are better than this, you're stronger.''

Gaara's shoulders heaved in exertion. His muscles tense as he stared at the blonde with crazed eyes. This was his love since he had been an adolescent. This had been his savior. He had left him alone for so long believing that he would be far happier without him.

He had allowed Konoha to break him apart. Now he had to pick up the pieces.

He noticed the shaking of Naruto's shoulders and watched with bated breathe as the blonde finally let go and cried, gripping Gaara's broad shoulders and pressing his body against him tightly as if he was trying to crawl into Gaara and never leave. The sand nin held him tightly and listened as Naruto took out his rage and his pain but mostly his unbearable sadness.

He had woken sleeping beauty only to deal with the reason he was asleep in the first place. Softly he kissed the blonde's head and stroked his back.

He listened to the babbling stream of incoherent words strung together, but mostly he listened to one word repeated over and over again.

''Yes.''

Naruto had given his approval, he had given his answer to the question Gaara had asked. Slowly Naruto tilted his head up to join Gaara in a kiss. It was nothing more than a gentle meeting of lips, but there would be time for other things much later. After Naruto had healed.

Gently Gaara cradled the kitsune in his arms and began the trip to Suna. Gathering his sand he made it in a record breaking hour. There were many things to prepare.

That was the night a man was brought back from the dead.


	2. Chapter Two: Dead Man Breathing

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Song: Vienna Teng: Gravity

Chapter Two: Dead Man Breathing:

_Hey love_

_Is that the name you're meant to have_

_for me to call?_

In Suna there was no winter to be found, no snow on the pavement but in the private rooms of the Kazekage winter reined supreme. It was as if everything stood still, it was as if everything had frozen. There was no life in the room, no pictures, no knickknacks, nothing unnecessary, only four walls an unused bed, a closet and a desk. The room became winter in it's frozen nature. Here in this barren wasteland of a room, laid a figure buried under heaps of blankets despite the scalding temperatures outside. This was the room where the healing began.

The figure was beautiful, as all dolls are, with hollow eyes and painted mouths. This particular doll had been uprooted to the warmer climates in hopes that it would get better here. In hopes that it would shed it's porcelain covers for skin.

Konoha mourned for the loss on the outside, the villagers not wanting to upset the new Rokudaime Hokage, but on the inside they rejoiced at the loss of the demon child. Fleet after fleet of ANBU were sent searching but they came back empty handed and wanting instead, even those that actually looked. Nothing was to be found of the blonde shinobi.

Back in Suna, while Gaara had coiled him up in the security of his abode Naruto's progress was slow. ''Yes'' didn't mean that he was ready to be whole again. All yes meant was that he was willing to try, and Gaara understood.

Silently he watched, and silently he waited.

Impassive as the sand itself he waited for the blonde to move. He wouldn't push or force instead he would watch to see where the blonde was most comfortable.

Hours as they have a funny habit of doing became days became weeks and Naruto stayed immobile, and hidden from the rest of Suna. He stayed curled in bed while Gaara waited. Often the red head would lay beside him watching the ceiling and trying to figure out just what the blonde saw in the flat white surface. Did he see the untouched paint, or the faces of his former friends. When he turned to the side, Gaara wrapped his arms around him, large hands sheltering the smaller blonde. He would lay a kiss on his bony shoulder, always the right one and always on that little freckle he had. He would hold him until the blonde turned back around.

In all honesty, Gaara knew nothing of fixing people, but he was patient, and in the end that patience made progress. After all, fixing a broken soul took far more than a few rolls of duct tape and a pat on the back.

A few days after the second week, Naruto moved. It was a lazy morning, the type that creeps through the cracks of the window slowly like molasses. The sun had barely peeked through the window and everyone was still asleep inside their houses, luxuriating in the slow nature of the day. It was the day Naruto sat up from the bed and slowly, ever so slowly got up from the bed and tentatively moved towards the balcony, step by step. Gaara stood by and watched in silence.

His feet shook with each step and he clung to the wall, but he was moving. The final step led him outside just in time for the sun rise. Leaning back Naruto rested on Gaara's chest before turning around and pulling his hand with a curious quirk of the lips and a gentle tug. His movements were jerky like that of a marionette but they were movements.

His eyes had for the first time since that night come to life, and for that Gaara was endlessly grateful.

Gaara swept his hands under Naruto and carried him down to the empty street below. Slowly they walked through the streets, Naruto quivering slightly but safe in Gaara's strength. This was were the healing would really begin, here in the dusty streets of Suna Naruto would find his sanctuary. It was here that he would build new dreams, but first he had to learn to walk.

It was a short walk, and no one had been there to witness it, but it was truly beautiful, if not heartbreaking. The once loud and vibrant Naruto hunched over and clutching Gaara's hand like a lifeline. His eyes dulled with some kind of pain, but no longer empty.

When the returned Naruto slowly pressed his lips to Gaara's and once again curled up in bed.

The kiss was enough. Gaara was after all patient and he would not ask for more that Naruto could give. He would wait for the kitsune to be whole before taking him.

A soft voice called out from the covers, slightly rough from being unused.

_'' Can you fix me?''_

Gaara replied with the same word that had started this, and he spoke it with the conviction of a dieing man.

_''Yes.''_

Hours became days became weeks, but Gaara could wait, after all the first step had already been taken that night that seemed so long ago in their world of sand.


	3. Chapter Three: Dead Man Speaking

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter Three: Dead Man Speaking

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**Would you speak for me ?**

In Suna the days were short an the nights long. By evening most people were out, appreciating the cooler air, and by 3 am the streets were empty, especially in the more affluent areas of town. Everyone had either gone to bed or elsewhere. Those who went elsewhere wouldn't be back till morning, and when they returned it it would be morning and they would reek or perfume and cigarettes. Their bodies swaying half drunk, and the other half sober.

It was the perfect time to go for a walk.

Often Gaara would escort Naruto out for a small walk around the general area, or he would bring him to isolated parts of the desert few, if any people knew of. For Naruto that was perfect.

It was as if the night had spun this world for the two of them alone, this gentle haunting world where the shadows bent and swayed invitingly and the moon cast its spell. In this world their existence was singular and isolated, and in this world that was an easy thing to believe. No people where seen, or had seen them, so no other people existed.

It was an intoxicating feeling, and it was these nights that began to bind the Kazekage and his blonde companion closer together.

Through the past weeks, they had grown closer together in the smallest and most powerful ways, after all it was always the small things that got you. It was the way Gaara always brought Naruto oranges regardless of the effort it took to import them into the desert wasteland that created Suna and the way Gaara would come back to find his bath ready and his paper work done. It was the way, The red head ran his fingers through the blonde's soft downy hair as he slept, and the way their hands brushed against each other before coming effortlessly together.

Some people created bonds from words and speeches, and others from actions. It was these simple actions that brought them together.

Despite Naruto's new energy, and his will to move from the bed he was still swept into lethargic moods wherein he reverted back to old habits. He would curl himself into a ball, as if could wish the world away and in his trembling state Gaara could only hope that he succeeded. The trembling mass would curl into itself with every breath, and every sound, Gaara often wondered if he was hurting himself, but he didn't dare move the blonde.

The last time he had attempted that the poor blonde and broken down into hysterical and disturbingly silent tears, as if he couldn't let anyone hear him at all. The first time he had done something like that Gaara had been so shocked that he just stayed there and watched in horror as he saw exactly what kind of damage had been done.

He had torn people limb from limb, and he had been branded a monster for the atrocities committed, but he had never broken someone quite like this before. He had never taken someone and given them hope only to tear it apart when they got close enough to believe. He had never ripped someone from the inside to satisfy his own irrational fear and he had certainly never caused anyone to cry silently in some sick hope that they would for that moment no longer exist.

And they called him a monster.

In non existence he became safe, because here, there where no expectations, here no one could hurt him, because he wasn't there.

Day's like that left Gaara contemplating if he should simply kill the blonde and put him out of his misery. It would be merciful, and far easier than the suffering he faced, but every time he talked himself into it, it only took one look at the blond to change his mind.

In his own selfishness he kept him alive, because he could not bare to lose Naruto. He could never bare that, so instead he would fix him, if it took a lifetime to do it.

He would piece him back together bit by bit and he would be left with something beautiful and something that would be irrevocably his, but days like that brought the red haze of anger to cloud his mind, and the bile to rise in his throat. Days like that made him clench his fists while he could do nothing more than watch.

In a way that was the most painful part of the entire ordeal. He could only watch and hope for the blonde to get better.

These fits happened when he thought of Konoha, which Gaara had taken to thinking of as the village of traitors and cowards. These fits happened because they had hurt him so badly that he could no longer function as he used to.

There were no more bright sunny smiles, or loud beautiful laughter.

There were no more words left at all. The Naruto Uzumaki who would speak endlessly about anything and everything had gone. The blonde refused to speak, or form any sound at all. It was as if he had truly forgotten how to speak. The last words he had spoken seemed so long ago in the red heads eyes, and every step he took to correct the problem seemed to push him away.

He was left with nothing but the hope that it would get better._Someday_

Someday the blonde, would be better, someday he would be as he used to and the broken would be fixed.

Someday he would be himself again, happy an vibrant. Someday he would lay in Gaara's arms and be content with his life, whatever he chose to do with it. Someday he wouldn't hurt anymore, and when that day came Gaara would be waiting with open arms for him and only him.

Someday couldn't come fast enough.

As Gaara entered the room occupied by him and his angel he was not prepared for seeing the image of the blonde standing to meet him. He was biting his lip nervously and his hands were clenched to stop from shaking. Gaara's heart skipped a beat and just as he was about to speak a soft lilting voice greeted him.

''Welcome home.''

The words were unsteady, but they had been spoken. Like everything else that had happened with Naruto, it did not matter how it had happened or if it had been done well, all that had mattered was that it had been done. He had finally spoke the words Gaara had needed to hear.

Anything he could have said would have been what Naruto needed to hear, after all Gaara had been waiting to hear anything the blonde could have possibly said.

In his eyes the blonde could do no wrong, and absolutely everything about the nervous way he was greeted home was perfect.

The words swept over Gaara, as he paused before running his hand over Naruto's lower lip to stop him from biting it. With a soft smile on his lips he replied with a soft kiss placed on Naruto's head. No words were needed, and as he gazed at the slightly dull look in the blonde's eyes he noticed that they were far from being as lifeless as they used to be.

Someday was coming, faster than anyone could imagine, but no matter how fast it came, it would never be soon enough for a red head named Gaara who wished nothing more than for someday to have never needed to come in the first place.

**Would you even say a word ?**


	4. Chapter Four: Dead Man Changing

Disclaimer: I own nothing, not even Naruto...

Chapter Four: Dead Man Changing

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Their routine had become well known to the two of them. It was simply how life was, and at a certain point Gaara had come to realized that life had not always been like this. That there hadn't always been this peace set upon him. He had come to realize that he couldn't for the life of him remember how he had lived before Naruto had crashed into his life.

It was as if his life had simply divided itself into two separate sections. Before and After Naruto. The Before area was blurred and unimportant, as if it wasn't anything to be concerned about. He remembered all of it, but it was as if everything had been painted grey, and useless.

The After was a myriad of colors, and sensations, as if somehow everything was now so much sharper. As if everything had some kind of obscure meaning. It was a bit unnerving, but all in all it was peaceful.

As broken as Naruto was, he still lit up any room he entered and changed whoever he came in contact with.

The changes were completely unnoticed by Gaara. For when one changes, one can never really remember when they began to change. Often times they notice nothing different and only when they look back do they realize that they had in fact become something else. By then it is to late to revert back, and then they change again, as people often do.

The morning the Kazekage walked up to his secretary who silently handed him his schedule as she had for the past years he had held his position nearly fell out of her chair when he delivered as quiet yet no less meaningful thank you.

She was an older woman named Asuka with greying hair, and three children. She had held her position since the last Kazekage, Gaara's father, and she had seen a lot of things that could unsettle a person. But this had nearly unseated her. This quiet thank you. Asuka didn't know whether to be upset or amused.

The Kazekage was changing, and it was a terrifying thing to watch. He was...happier but she knew that it wasn't her place to ask.

When the seventh intern that month had a minor panic attack because the Kazekage, ruthless murderer had done something human, Asuka had enough. She brought in every minor worker in the office. The so called ''little people'' of the speeches. You know the ones given at award ceremonies. ''I would like thank all the little people...'' and so. The office workers who were not ninja but far more dangerous when they had not received coffee.

They were the people who sorted through piles of mail, and organized meetings. They were the ones pulling all nighters to try and figure out where everyone should be seated and what events their socially awkward Kage could attend without mass panic setting in.

They were the ones who somehow survived dealing with the ninja and had a report for throwing coffee, staplers and anything else they could get their hands on when displeased.

They were also getting the worst dressing down in the history of Suna because the seventh intern had freaked when Gaara, had smiled.

Ladies and gentlemen he smiled. The world is ending.

Asuka spent 3 hours, yelling at them for their stupidity, after which, while everyone was rather freaked out by Gaara's new behavior they kept it to themselves in fear from the head secretary.

Even his siblings had noticed the changes. Gaara wasn't the most social of people but he responded to questions when they were asked for reasons other than professional. Temari had abused this new change and had figured out the following. Gaara's favorite color was red, his favorite food non existent, and the reason he was so happy question was met with a blank stare.

The change was a good thing, probably.

Naruto however appeared to be the same. He walked listlessly, pacing back and forth with his shoulders hunched. In truth he had good days and bad.

On the good ones he would speak to Gaara, welcoming him home. The would go over the paper work together and walk through the streets at midnight. Sometimes they would share a kiss, on the cheek or lips.

These were the soft kisses. The ones that were meant for comfort and reassurance. Often they were followed by the stroking of the back or sides, and often they happened at night in the dark of their room. These kisses were soft and gentle. Gaara would breathe in the vanilla scent of Naruto's hair and curl his arms around the slighter frame.

Their hands would touch and join, as Naruto fell into troubled sleep. Gaara, would watch, waking him if the dream was particularly bad and watching him if he did not dream at all. It was nights like these where Naruto would toss of the bedsheets and flail his limbs as if someone was attacking him that made Gaara thankful that he could not sleep.

It made him thankful that he would never face the nightmare world that tortured him beloved to point of tears, yet disappointed because without a lack of knowledge he wasn't sure how he was supposed to help. So he clumsily held the smaller body and rocked him back and forth as the shaking subsided.

The grip on the smaller body felt awkward and unsure but he would hold on and hope that the comfort he was trying to give was coming in loud and clear to the small figure who needed it desperately.

The nights where he only slept and did not dream, (for Naruto all dreams became nightmares) he would stroke those scared cheeks and observe the peaceful look on his face. In sleep he seemed untroubled by the world. As if the weight that had settled onto his shoulders in the waking hours, and pressed on him until he curled into himself no longer existed.

It was as if he unfolded and all the again and misery in the world could not touch him. He was once again the old Naruto Uzumaki for the duration of time that he slept. Upon waking the transformation was heartbreaking. Like watching the gossamer wings of a butterfly curl back into its body until the once beautiful creature reverted back into a caterpillar.

It was wrong, as if if he was mocking the way things should be, the way things should have always been.

His eyes would light up for a second before they dulled, and his shoulders bend down, his arms crossed against his body and his legs pressed together. He curled himself inward and there was nothing Gaara could do to bring back the happiness he had witnesses but a few seconds before.

On bad days he was inconsolable. Curled up on the bed they shared, he would cry silently. As if someone could hear him the isolated area of the Kazekage's bedchamber.

No one came here, whether it was out of fear or respect the red haired man did not know, but all that mattered was that he had been left with his privacy intact. A privacy he needed to piece together the fallen form of his blonde caterpillar.

Gaara would become his cocoon, he would piece him back together.

The blonde was getting better, and the good days came more often, but it was never enough. Fear filled Gaara when he witnessed his worst days. These were the days that made him feel the bile rise in his throat.

He would smile, as if he happy, in some form of sick parody. He would for all intents and purposes become himself again. His demeanor would be perfect, until the tears began to leak from his eyes in long steady streams, and would do nothing, only act as his happy cheerful self, but the tears wouldn't stop, and the contradiction clenched at Gaara's heart.

Often he would grab the blonde by the shoulders and clutch him to his body, forgoing any work to hold Naruto close and tear off his mask.

Every time Naruto built up his mask Gaara would steel himself for a long night. He would tell the blonde of Konoha and Sasuke over an over again until he broke down, sobbing into the front of Gaara's shirt.

The Kazekage could not hate himself more in moments like those, where he would have to break down the already damaged blonde in hopes that when he tried to build himself back up gain he would not use a mask.

He hated the villagers that made it necessary for that mask to exist and he wondered how long it had bee in place. He wondered if his love had been suffering this entire time, only to break under the final blow. The mask filled up and reached it's limit breaking apart and leaving nothing but the inside.

Unfortunately the inside wasn't the prettiest thing to see.

It was mangled and twisted from years of abuse hidden behind candy cane smiles and fake happiness. It was brilliant and sickening but it was Naruto. It was part of him, and perhaps it was a part that no one could change but Gaara would try, come hell or high water.

They were both changing as people do, and it was Gaara's most profound hope that they would change for the better.

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	5. Chapter Five: Dead Man Seeing

Disclaimer: I own nothing, in case anyone thought I did.

Chapter Five: Dead Man Seeing

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Unexpected as it was when it did happen, Gaara knew that it had to happen at some point. The impact of the situation left him shaking despite previous knowledge of its inevitability.

Temari had stormed after him at some unholy time in the evening when all was quiet. Unfortunately, that happened to be one of the nights Naruto had deemed him worthy to walk with. Some esteemed person from the council had died, and they suspected an assassination, and by suspected they had captured the killer and had him put away for torture and interrogation.

The council member had been disliked but because he was of the council Gaara had to be notified immediately.

If it had been any other time Gaara would have sensed her coming from miles away. Any other time but the time he spent observing his blonde when he appeared to be at his best. Sadly Temari snuck up unnoticed and unwanted.

Despite being his sister, and despite the fact that she was only doing the job that she was assigned, when he saw her closing in on them he could feel the urge to claw her throat out come upon him. He wanted nothing more than to take Naruto far away from her and run. He wasn't ready for people yet. How could he be?

It was the people in his life who left him like this. Half dead, and dieing on the inside, a fragile shell of his former self.

That woman was his sister and he cared for her dearly. Temari was at heart a wonderful person, but in his desperation to protect his beloved she became nothing more than an obstacle. At that distance he knew that she would have spotted Naruto. Running was out of the option, and hiding the blonde would not be in his best interest lest he have a panic attack.

Naruto eyed the blonde with disinterest his eyes flickering briefly over her form before turning back towards Gaara. Tonight was a good night and Gaara prayed it would stay that way lest he be forced to feed his sister to the bloody sand that stretched over his skin and collected in the gourd strapped to his back.

She landed in front of him, eyes widening just a fraction at the sight of Naruto. She knew the blonde. He had after all saved her younger brother. Training taught her to keep her mouth shut, despite the questions she desperately wanted to ask.

Konoha had been looking for him, but one look into her brother's eyes told her they wouldn't be getting him back. Gaara was furious. Years of being with Gaara taught her never to stay long when he was like this. Thing happened when Gaara was this upset, bad things. Naruto though, was calm staying at her brothers side, without speaking. She had thought that the blonde was hyper. In fact she could have sworn that he was.

The figure to right of her brother was so much... sadder, than the boy she remembered.

Quickly, she erased all thoughts from her head. This wasn't her business and Gaara was edgy enough as it was. She had sworn that she heard him growl as she looked over the blonde. She did two things at that point. She informed him that Hiruko was dead and she got the fuck out of there.

She knew better that to test him. Traditionally, he would come with her to see the killer and observe the interrogation. She would tell them he was busy at the moment, and the nija working under her would not question her word. Of what she witnessed, she would not tell a soul. If her brother had the blonde Leaf nin with him, it wasn't her place to ask why, anyone else and she would have been screaming but her baby brother had never been anyone else, and tonight he had been ready to kill.

She had recognized that look from so long ago when he had been so in touch with Shukaku. That was the look of a raging animal and she would not anger him further. Temari was many things but she was not, nor would she ever be stupid.

Unknown to her, her presence alone had unnerved the blonde. The sight of another human being, one who wasn't as soothing as Gaara, brought bile to his throat and taste of vomit to his mouth. Heaving he groaned in pain. He wasn't ready to see, people, let alone deal with them at this point and her face brought back so many unpleasant memories.

The chuunin exam was where they started, and from the chuunin exam it became the memory of Sasuke leaving. Traitor. His mind whispered, as it had been whispering ever since the very first announcement. Filthy traitor. The worst part of it all was that he had the guts to apologize after stealing the position Naruto had coveted fro years, and he had known it. He spoke the words I'm sorry as if his forgiveness was a guaranty. As if he was already forgiven and the words were but an afterthought.

He knew, they all knew exactly what they took from him, and somehow, sorry was supposed to cut it.

He was snapped out of his thoughts by the feel of large hands on his back, stroking him, as he heaved his sickness onto the desert sand. The sickness they had left him with.

Gaara had been absolutely wonderful to him. Gaara was safe, and Gaara would never hurt him because he knew all to well how broken Naruto already was. Gaara would keep him safe and alive while he pulled him back together. He wouldn't tell him empty words or give fake tears of repentance while he stabbed him in the back.

He clung to the red head's shirt and sobbed, as he was carried back their home.

Gaara would not take him or his forgiving nature for granted, expecting him to put up with ridiculous amounts of pain only to come out worth a smile. Gaara would not hurt him, if he could help it, and Gaara loved him. For one so attention starved as Naruto, that became the very air he breathed. He could be happy because the red head loved him, and for now that would be enough.

His self worth rode on the undying affection Gaara gave to him, and the warm feeling he sent down to his broken heart. One day he would define himself by his terms and his own worth would rely on more than the emotions of another. For now, however, in his most fragile state, there was no other choice but to cling to the the sand nin like a crutch.

Gaara loved him, therefore he meant something. Gaara loved him, so he should live, because to die would hurt him.

In his befuddled state of mind Naruto felt his thinking as sane and rational as anything in this world. THe constant state of abuse he had faced had finally broken him apart, and in his healing he clung to the most unhealthy of things to make himself feel better. This was not the ''proper'' was to begin healing. It was most certainly not healthy, but these wounds could heal later when they were the only thing keeping him alive.

His life depended on another, and in that tight wire act Gaara refused to left Naruto fall.

He would cradle Naruto's wants and needs in the depths of heart as well as the blonde's reason to live. He would be strong for Naruto no longer had strength left to spare.

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End file.
